How to Instill Empathy in Your Child

“Opinion is really the lowest form of human knowledge. ... The highest form of knowledge is empathy, for it requires us to suspend our egos and live in another's world. It requires profound purpose larger than the self kind of understanding.”

-Plato

Empathy is the heart of human connection; being empathic toward another takes extreme patience and kindness. We live in a society that pushes us to care only about the next thing that will bring us a sense of happiness. The problem with this trend is that we all want our cake without baking it first. Come on; you can “bake” a cake in the microwave. We are a generation of convenience, and it is killing us. We are spoiled. We may not have everything we desire in this life, but most of us have what we need. Stepping back to appreciate the things in life that truly matter will bring life into perspective. We do not need to suffer the many terrible pains our grandparents did, but we can learn from them. We all deserve to be successful, to have the freedom to do the things we choose, and to get the most out of our lives. Ensuring that our children grow up to be empathetic and learning to be empathetic ourselves is one of the best ways to change the world for the better.

Here are some research-driven ways to aid in the development of your child:

Parental Warmth

The way you respond to your child has a profound impact on your child’s development. Being sensitive to your child’s needs will increase their feelings of security and trust. When children feel that they have some autonomy or control, they have more room to understand others’ emotions.

Be Supportive and Affectionate

If your child shows you a picture they drew, or how well they jump, etc., it is the perfect opportunity to show your child support. A simple “well done” will make them feel good about themselves and build self-esteem.

Build Self-Esteem

Children that have a sense of belonging in the world are more likely to grow up believing they deserve love and belonging. If they possess self-esteem, they will grow through their vulnerabilities in life in a more manageable way. If you want to hear more about this, check out this TedTalk on The power of vulnerability.

Be Expressive

Showing your emotions will demonstrate to your child how and when to express themselves; they will have a stronger understanding of social cues and will be less likely to display negative behaviors. It is also essential to exhibit “a moderate amount of exposure to negative emotions [because this] promotes emotional understanding, and therefore empathy (Woolston, 20).”

Spend Quality Time Together

Spending time with your children, especially constructive time, will increase your children’s sense of security in the family, resulting in a child willing to explore the world. Seeing different things and meeting new people will increase empathy.

Discipline

The research suggests, the best form of discipline to increase empathy in children is inductive reasoning. Inductive reasoning is sitting your child down to explain how their behavior and actions affect the other person. It is imperative that this explanation is age-appropriate, or it will have little to no impact on them. Being consistent and firm is crucial because the research “suggests that permissive parenting may communicate to the child that they do not need to be concerned about the feelings of others (Woolston, 24).”

Take Care of Yourself

Happier parents tend to exhibit empathetic behaviors; therefore, children tend to be more empathetic.

Resources

Woolston, A. (n.d.). The development of empathy in childhood (thesis). Retrieved from https://core.ac.uk/reader/48368